What’s in a plant name, indeed? I enjoy finding new-to-me cultivars at the garden center or spring plant sales that stretch the limits of reasonable nomenclature with their hyperbolic, fanciful or puzzling monikers. Kind of like my favorite example outside the garden sphere, a local company called Accurate Trash Removal.
This season’s discoveries started with Bergenia ‘Fairytale Romance’ PPAF. The pink flowers are lovely indeed. But the most convincing “fairytale romance” aspect I have seen is that the blooms vanish rather quickly.
Next I found Silphium perfoliatum ( cup plant) ‘The Holy Grail.’ This one is clever; I get it that the grail is a cup and all that. But talk about lofty goals! Brought to you by Intrinsic Perennial Gardens, Inc.- another good name.
And lastly, my personal favorite: Hypericum perforatum (St. John’s Wort) ‘Miracle Grandeur.’ Delightful as this plant is, I doubt most observers would reach for those two particular words to describe it. I guess “Cute and Cheerful” didn’t impress the focus groups? Perhaps there is a “lost in translation” spin from the Dutch hybridizer? As it is patented, they’ve got to sell mass quantities to make a good profit, so maybe that’s where the hope of a miracle comes in.
Then there are the plants I haven’t run across yet, but their names alone are tantalizing. Or sometimes terrifying, as with Hibiscus ‘Raging Bull,’ described as “commanding your attention like a bull in full charge.” That’s more attention grabbing than most would find desirable.
The Crazytunia Maniac series of petunias is both hyperbolic and redundant. If only these grew as wildly as their names imply. Sadly, chances are good the insanity will be running out of steam by early August.
And of course roses have some of the most over-the-top names of all. I’m thinking of you, ‘Sexy Rexy’!
My favorite plant name was “Jethro Tull” for a fluted coreopsis. And like most coreopsis, it lasted only a couple of years.
Love it! And yet Jethro Tull the band has been around since 1967… what gives??
I love all the ridiculous plant names, and I won’t lie, the outrageous names work on me from a marketing perspective. I often find myself drawn to them, and maybe even giving them a chance in my garden based on name.
For example, I don’t much like Phormiums and I don’t like the color maroon, and I definitely don’t need any more strappy foliage in my flowerbeds full of irises and daylilies. Yet, when I came across Phormium “Black Adder” I very nearly bought it anyway because I loved Rowan Atkinson’s TV show Black Adder so much!
Links to both the plant and the BBC series, for the curious:
https://sunsetplantcollection.com/the-collection/plant/black-adder/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blackadder
Aren’t we all just putty in the plant-marketers’ hands.
I love that show, too! There is also an Agastache called Black Adder. I wish I could find one, it’s so much better than the dishwater washed out purple that you often see in garden centers now.
Worst rose name ever–what comes to mind is ‘Weight Watcher’s Success’.
Jethro Tull (1674-1741) was an English agriculturist from Berkshire who helped to bring about the British Agricultural Revolution of the 18th century.
Wow, that takes the cake for sure!
Now that is something worth remembering! 🙂
I learn something new every day! I’m big Jethro Tull fan. Ever heard “Jacks In The Green”? They are plural. Great Rant!
Good rant. Yes, Sexy Rexy is one of dumbest rose names ever. Plant naming has sort of gone the way of naming housing subdivisions in the U.S. Just pull together some meaningless words like meadow and summer and hilltop and put them together: Summer Meadow, Hilltop Meadow, Summer Hilltop, you get the idea …
So true! But at least some of those meaningless names are amusing, no?
Heuchera Bloody Dinosaur is a new one. I find PW Color Choice marketers come up with the silliest for their shrubs
Yikes! That name is a doozy.
First of all, before insulting Intrinsic Perennial Gardens, you should have Googled them. He is one of the top hybridizers of the best plants in the industry. One of the biggest challenges for new plant introducers is creating new names. Who are you related to that got you a chance to write for Garden Rant?
Wow, a little touchy about a rant that I think was supposed to be light-hearted. I don’t think you have to be related to any of the regulars since I have seen guest ranters on here often. Go into your garden and breathe.
Thanks Kris for your calming influence.
No insults intended, Jennifer. My post was edited and I did not actually write “whoever they are.” I certainly did Google Intrinsic Perennial Gardens, and have great respect for the work they do.
Yike. This struck me as a lighthearted post and meant to poke fun at something we’re all rolling our eyes over occasionally – no nepotism at GardenRant I can assure you. I may be putting words into his mouth, but I think The Holy Grail has a double meaning – not only that it is a cup plant but that Brent Horvath managed to breed something elusive into it — the chartreuse leaves.
The modern day branding (and thus inability to duplicate a registered trademark) is making plant names ever crazier – much like race horses. And now that there’s the possibility of serious money in it, we have more new hybrids than we’ve perhaps ever had. There’s only so many names to go around. Thanks for your Rant Barbara – Aunt Marianne
Just kidding.
Spirited opinions of passionate plant people are all good. I also did not write the headline and never said that any of these plants “underdeliver,” to be clear. Thanks Marianne for your insights!
This isn’t about plant names per se, but I’m always nonplussed by those descriptions of plant leaves that refer to them as some tinge of “blue”. As I see them, they’re some shade of GREEN. Pure and simple. I think somebody in the PR department just desperately wants to boast of blue leaves.
Sure, like when supposedly “black” leaves or flowers are more of a dark purple.
We like to buy plants that include a family or friend’s name. Example: Magnolia ‘Jane’ for my granddaughter, Chrysanthemum ‘Beth’ for my mother, Anemone ‘Margarette’ and Hydrangea ‘Alice’ for two different grandmothers.
Some of the newer plant names are fun as well as descriptive: Achillea ‘Peter Cotton Tail’, Amsonia ‘Storm Cloud’, Agastache ‘Mango Tango’, and more…
That is a very sweet tradition! I’ve been looking for Barbara’s Buttons myself.
My favorite so far is “Primal Scream“ daylily,
Makes me giggle every time!
That is indeed a wonderful name!
How could you write this without mentioning Hostas? “striptease”, “teeny weeny bikini”. There are whole series of sketchy names for Hostas.
Wow, those are great! “With The Mosta” could be another goodie.
Somehow I’ve managed to lodge the name ‘Blood Wedding’ into my head every time I see a ‘Red Dragon’ Persicaria. It’s driving me crazy and completely un-lodgeable. In fact I just had to google the real name just to write this comment. Which is another reason I’m a big fan of labeling one’s plants – for failing or fantastical memories. – MW
O, huh, just when you’ve given us an inescapable Marianne name for that plant. What we would have missed had it had a correcting label for you……
Buying a plant because of its marketing name is like buying beer or wine because the label artwork caught your eye. Of course that’s how a lot of beer and wine gets purchased.
Right- buyer beware is the name of the name game!
As a horror movie fan, I just had to buy the daylily “Bela Lugosi” years ago, and it was indeed a deep, dramatic velvety wine color. Alas, Mother Nature drove a stake through its heart: it did not come back after one particularly tough CT winter.
Sorry to hear of his demise. If you like ‘The
Shining,’ apparently there is a “Red Rum” lupine!
Time was, all of the best names went to vegetables. Mortgage Lifter tomatoes, Lazy Wife pole beans, Painted Lady melons, and Zipper Cream cowpeas for the easiest shelling. The corn patch had a violent streak for a while with Bloody Butcher and Howling Mob until Country Gentleman came along to settle the air. Among garden flowers, one needs to head north for any kind of understatement, eh? My Canadian Explorer rose “John Cabot”, whose virtues could justify endless superlatives, has never failed to satisfy after 35 years of of Wisconsin winter hardships.
Yes, those vegetable names are very colorful! And your rose sounds like a real gem. I enjoyed finding out more about it here: https://ottawacitizen.com/news/local-news/felicitas-j-svejda-1920-2016-rose-expert-was-a-national-treasure-respected-around-the-world
Thanks for the link. What a great obituary.
As a Star Trek geek, I have purchased Starship Enterprise iris, Temporal Anomaly iris, and Captain Kirk hosta. It didn’t matter what they looked like, it was all about the name (though Temporal Anomaly is a fantastic iris!). And as for Primal Scream–also makes me giggle and the the name is only reason I have that relatively boring (from a color standpoint) orange daylily. It does look great next to Nosferatu, another daylily that cracks me up. So yes, putty we are.
Temporal Anomaly does sound fantastic! You made me wonder if there is a plant named for Chewbacca as well: https://www.indefenseofplants.com/blog/tag/chewbacca
Went on a mostly forgettable daylily garden tour a few years back . The only daylily I remember was a miniature called “Little Wart”.
It looks quite pretty!
Some plant names just crack me up such as ‘Primal Scream’ but some are just weird like Caladium ‘Frog in a Blender’-ouch! Of course I bought both of those plants along with others such as Hosta ‘Woop Woop’ & Hosta ‘Wiggles & Squiggles’! I just couldn’t resist!
‘Frog in a Blender’ has to be one of the standout names for sure. Have to say it provides a pretty good description, in fact!